Although it is only a small thing, your behaviour can make a big difference to your life.
It’s time to be honest with ourselves each and every one of us have acted in damaging and toxic ways in the past at some point. No-one reading this is an exception who has never had a bad mood swing, but there are some people who learn from the times they were toxic and evolve to stop it being a common occurrence.
You need to recognise the times when your attitude is negative and change the way you think and feel in order to have a happy life. This is true whether these moments are rare or happen regularly.
There are 12 toxic behaviours that are the most common that you should look out for, which are described below.
1. Feeling Envy Of Everyone Around You
You need to do your best to fight feeling jealous or envious of others. Envy is essentially the act of counting the blessings of others rather than your own blessings. No-one finds this behaviour admirable or appealing. So you need to stop looking at other’s journey in life in comparison to yours. It is not a competition. The only person you are and should be in competition with is yourself. You should be trying to better yourself to be the best version of you possible.
2. Taking Things Personally
When people feel that everything bad that happens around them is directly aimed at them or about them in some way, it is very off-putting and toxic. What people do and say to you actually says more about them than it does about you. Their reactions to you as a person is connected to their experiences, wounds and perspectives. If they think you are the worst or amazing, it is about them, not you. While no-one is suggesting you ignore all feedback and become a complete narcissist; what we are saying is that so much sadness, disappointment and hurt in life often comes from taking what people say and do to us way to personally. It makes more sense from a health and practical sense to let go of other’s views of you, good and bad, and use your own wisdom and intuition to guide you to be the person you want to be.
3. Always Acting Like The Victim
It is also toxic and can push people away if you are always complaining and making it seem like you are the victim. The key to avoiding this behaviour is to stop seeing yourself as a helpless victim and stop complaining and you’ll be surprised at how strong you really are.
4. Holding On To Loss And Pain
Without a shadow of a doubt, there is one lesson that is perhaps the hardest to learn in life – letting go. Regardless of whether it is letting go of loss, love, anger or guilt – change is never going to be very easy. You may spend a lot of time and energy fighting to let go in one situation while fighting to hold on in a different one. However, it is usually the case that letting go is the best path. By letting go, you rid your body and mind of toxic thoughts and feelings you’ve been holding onto.
5. Continually Thinking Negatively
People whose minds seem to be stuck on the negatives are hard to spend time with. Particularly when all they seem to do is talk about the unfairness of their life, their sufferings and the horrible things that have happened and COULD happen. People like this never see the positives in life or take anything positive away from things that happen. It is one thing to be a little pessimistic, but to constantly think only of the negatives is a very twisted way of thinking and experiencing life and one that drives people away.
6. Lacking Emotional Self Control
When you are unable to manage or control your emotions, everyone suffers from this toxic behaviour. You know the kind of people we are talking about – the type who burst into tears or go from calm to angry in a matter of seconds over the most insignificant of things. Yelling at their kid for accidentally spilling something on the floor, shouting and swearing at a colleague because they made a small error on some paperwork or getting so heated by having to wait a little longer in the queue at the till that they take it out on the employee who is only doing their job as best as they can.
If you have come to realise that you are just like the people described above, it may be that you need to find some help professionally to help control, your emotions and get to the bottom of what really is making you angry.