People always want to discredit long distance relationships and think they are always destined for disaster. Friends and family will discourage you from getting involved or taking them too seriously, to help save you from heartbreak.
No-one says it will be easy and having the extra distance between you will make things harder and some things impossible. There may be times when you feel sad and lonely and things will definitely be more complicated than a relationship with someone who lives closer. However, that extra distance between you and your partner can make the simplest things seem even sweeter. When you can’t eat and sleep with each other, touch and embrace and walk together all the time because of distance, when you actually do, it means even more.
Although long distance relationships can be tough, they can also be surprising. In the following article you will find 21 tips that could help make your long distance relationship stronger.
1. Stop Communicating Excessively
It is not wise to be overly possessive or clingy. The fact is that you don’t have to spend each and every day speaking for 12 hours or more to prevent your relationship from ending. There is a misconception that because you live further away that you need to do more. Not only is this false reasoning, it could make your relationship worse rather than better. If you overdo it and spend too much time together you will soon get tired and irritated of one another. Remember that less is more and it’s not about the quantity of time you spend together that’s important – it’s the quality.
2. View The Distance As An Opportunity
From the outset view it as a positive thing – a learning experience for you both and use it as a test to see just how much you love each other. Rather than seeing it as the thing that might pull you apart, see it as the thing that could strengthen your bond together.
3. Manage Your Expectations By Establishing Ground Rules
You both need to be very clear from the beginning of the relationship what you expect. Making ground rules will prevent either of you from doing something that may surprise the other. You need to discuss if you are exclusively dating or if you are both allowed to pursue dates with other people who live closer. It is much better to be open about these things from the outset.
4. Communicate Often And Creatively
It is important that you greet each other at the start and end of the day. In addition, you should update each other regularly on what is happening in your lives, regardless of how dull it may sound to you. To take things a step further – try sending pictures, videos and audio clips from time to time. When you put in effort like this, you show your partner that even though you can’t be together physically as much as you would like, they are still important to you and you love them.
5. Talk Dirty
One of the most important things between couples is sexual tension. Although sex isn’t everything, the sexual desire you have for each other can act like glue and prevent you from drifting apart. As well as a biological need, sex is also an emotional need. You can keep the passion alive by sending each other sexy texts full of teasing and sexually provocative descriptions and innuendos.
6. Have A Shared Goal
You need to ask yourselves – “What will happen in the future?:”, “How long are we going to live apart?”, “What do we want to achieve from our relationship?” No matter how good a long term relationship may seem; it can’t last forever. Therefore sit down and make a plan that you both agree upon. Use a time line to mark down the time you are apart and the time you are together and figure out what your end gaol is going to be. It is important that you are both part of the planning and that you share the same goal and are on the same page.
7. Stay Away From Dangerous Situations
If you know you are going to be going out for a drink at a bar or to the club for some dancing with a group of your friends and that this will upset your partner, you have two options. The first is that you don’t go, while the second is that you tell your partner so they don’t worry. It is important to be sensible and sensitive about this because if you aren’t your partner will become upset, suspicious and very worried. It could feel to them that they are being put into a situation where they feel powerless.
You also need to guard yourself from falling in to avoidable traps. Even if you go out with the girl or guy from your work because they are funny and great company and you have no intention of doing anything with them; things can escalate rapidly. Remember to not only listen to your heart about these things, but also your mind too.