Why it is so important to feel confident in your parenting

Aug 16
important to feel confident in your parenting

Let’s face it, parenting is not easy. From the pregnancy itself to the post-partum journey, a lot of planning and important decision making is involved.

Post-partum depression aside, the general anxiety of being responsible for another human being’s well-being is enough to make you doubt your own inner strength.

If your goal is to be the best parent you can possibly be and for your children to have a healthy and normal childhood, you need to have confidence in your parenting.

In this article, I am going to discuss the importance of maintaining a healthy level of confidence if you want your children to grow up to be balanced and healthy adults.

I will also discuss a few factors that lead to low confidence levels in addition to giving you a few helpful tips that can boost your confidence and help you become a better parent. 


What causes a lack of confidence?

Not everyone can describe themselves as a confident individual. In fact, quite a lot of people go through life doubting their every move.

As damaging as a lack of confidence can be to your own personal life, it becomes even more damaging when you hold another human being’s life in your hands. There are many factors that lead to people losing confidence:

  • Childhood trauma caused by abuse, neglect or loss.
  • Negative feedback from family members, friends, and society about your parenting abilities.
  • Inadequate preparation for parenthood.

There are plenty of other factors that contribute to your lack of confidence and each one is capable of negatively impacting your child’s future in the long run. 


Why is confidence in your parenting so important?

Many people falsely believe that their parenting relies heavily on their children but in actual fact, it has more to do with your approach and personal attitude than anything else.

Regardless of how troublesome your children are or how society perceives them, the general responsibility will always return to you and your ability to handle the challenge of parenthood.

Parents who are constantly anxious and insecure are likely to project their feelings onto their children. There a few examples of children who have turned out to be problematic in the future because they were raised by parents who were not confident in their abilities.

Let me share just two scenarios with you:

Scenario – 1

An anxious mother who is always worried that her child will make the same mistakes she made when she was young is likely to come across as overprotective and controlling.

She is the mother who is always telling her child how to dress, what to do and who not to hang out with. Usually, children raised by such parents might grow up to be resentful and might spend their adult lives trying to make up for the fun times they missed.

The consequence? A potential lifetime of reckless behavior and irresponsible decision making that will also have a negative impact on how they parent their own children.

Scenario – 2

An insecure father who is always trying to compete with his son will miss out on milestone achievements and memorable moments because he is too busy trying to compensate for his own lack of self-confidence.

It’s possible for his insecurity to be passed onto his son and unless the son makes an effort to overcome his trauma, he will be stuck in the same cycle.

As you can tell from the above examples, a lack of confidence in your children could result in them repeating the same negative cycle in their own lives.

It is important to ensure that your children are raised in a loving and appreciative home that boosts their own confidence and leads them down a path of positive life choices


Tips to boost your confidence

Fortunately, it is possible for you to improve your confidence levels so that your kids can have better childhoods and futures.

The key is to keep it simple. It all starts with such little things like adding name labels to your kid’s belongings so that you can feel confident in everyday situations.

Another useful tip to boost your confidence is to read parenting books before your child arrives in addition to taking prenatal classes so that you know what to expect and how best to handle tricky situations.

When you feel somewhat prepared for the journey, you tend to feel more comfortable. If you have experienced severe childhood trauma or have dealt with many life obstacles that have led to you being less confident, you can always seek out professional help be it a counselor or a licensed therapist.

They tend to be better equipped to help you recover than friends or family members who might also be in denial about their own personal problems. 


Enjoy the moments

When all is said and done, parenthood is an incredible journey and it need not be so miserable. Look online for activities for children and keep your toddlers entertained. This helps build a healthy relationship with your children and you and your partner will both feel good about it.

It is important to not only maintain some self-confidence but to also take the time to enjoy the meaningful moments that you will never get back.